Just taking a small skim through this thread, I found some things that should be brought to your attention to give more of an appealing feel to the thread. (If you are willing to change a few things, of course.)
To start off, this thread is lacking detail. There's not much I can expand on for this, though, I think a lot of your paragraphs lack depth in the subject. You do get your point across, though very briefly. Lore interests a lot of people, it's how your server is ran in some aspects, and people need to know a lot about it. I
recommend redoing your paragraphs, finding all you can add to make it look creative and in-depth.
Visually, the thread's format is very unappealing and unorganized in my view. Without warning, you jump into the lore. What I mean by 'without warning', is that you should title a lot of things you talk about, like with what you did before explaining factions. That would be an example of organization, now for the appealing part. This thread looks very dull in a few aspects. It's like everything is just.. there. (I've included a link towards the bottom of the post to give you an example of what appealing looks like to me.)
Now, the originality in your text. Just skipping to your summary of the Resistance faction, I found a lot of 'Now,' and 'Although'. Most of them being too close together.
In my opinion, I think you should change your wording a little to not have so many words being multiplied. Think of different words that hold the same meaning. (If you need help, you can always google '<word> synonyms', or head over to and search.)
Though this is just me being picky, as it's pretty displeasing for me to read the same word so often.
To add a little to this, you have a
bunch of grammatical errors in this thread, even your community name in the red text. You typed 'vanguard Gaming' instead of 'Vanguard Gaming', for example.
Finally, a short IMO on originality of pictures you add in your thread. Usually, custom banners and pictures you take/create show commitment, originality and in some cases, trust. If you create your own content, it can show readers that you're trying to look nice, and like I said, in some cases they can trust that you want this to work out. You wouldn't want to create something for something you don't really care for, would you? Grabbing pictures from Google Images/HL2 site doesn't show originality and that you worked to look nice.
A thread to probably look up to for help would be this: , even though it doesn't revolve around HL2RP, you can see how
@Sixx did a lot of things that this thread is generally lacking.
Good luck.

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